Reading your story, I feel like after you guys were married you always knew that he would leave you at some point. Because you were so caught up with your thoughts about your body, your feelings you didn’t realize that this relationship was slipping away. Did you make an effort to win him back ? Did you try to be independent ? Being in an relationship should not be the goal of one’s life … there are so many things to do in a life … being loved is the greatest gift but that doesn’t mean not getting love is the end of the world. You always lived an unhappy life, try to focus on leading happy life independently … if you are happy you will attract the right relationships. What your husband did was bad for sure but can you blame him entirely ? Sometimes we are so engrossed in finding faults in others that our wrongdoings get unnoticed.